I knew I would get a migraine on the weekend and indeed I did… The weather is a trigger for me, with hot dry days being exceptionally hi-risk for me. Well, it is such a day on Sunday. Not the height of summer yet, by far so only a mini-heatwave at this point, but it was enough for me to feel some pulsating pain in my head in the morning. I knew I had to watch it, so had extra amounts of water to drink. Now, I've had weekend migraines in the past, and frankly, on Sunday it got me wondering if maybe I was "expecting" one. I meditated for a while and tried to keep it at bay, but I didn't take any painkillers to push it off. I thought maybe drinking plenty of water and meditating would be enough. I did feel better, got into quite a nice mood even. Then some friends of ours called and invited us over for lunch. They decided to have a spur of the moment BBQ and thought we might enjoy joining them. It was a spontaneous even for us as well, but we figured, why not. So we went over, had some nice food, and talked to people (they had their neighbors over as well). Then it sort of hit me, feeling weird and spaced out, and a pulsating pain in the right side of my head, right behind my eye. I didn't have any major painkillers with me, and I asked Deb, all she had was Tylenol. I popped in a couple of those, but I could tell it was too little too late.
My husband packed me into the car, I think he apologized for me, I was getting too dazed to talk much or even to listen. Fortunately it was a short drive home and I headed right into my bedroom, where my DH helped me darken the room and left me lying in the bed. He knows better than to bug me at those times, he just leaves me in peace, which is all I want and need. I lay in bed for God knows how long, just lying quietly, suffering and feeling the beginning of the nausea. The pain in my head was excruciating and I just tried not to move. I felt the familiar fear creep in, but fortunately, I am fully aware by now that the panic attack is just part of my migraine, so I don't let it take over. My stomach hurt, and twice I had to go to the bathroom with bouts of diarrhea. I could feel the buildup, my nausea getting worse, and I actually tried throwing up on my bathroom visits, but it wasn't it just yet. What a nightmare, that's the part I hate the most about my migraines, that peak where my whole body collapses into something crazy and quite violent. I feel restless, but I can't pace back and forth because my head feels like it's about to explode. I just sit in my bed, kicking my legs in the air, if that makes sense. Almost shaking, but not shivering, it is controlled. It just feels like I need to get something out of me. Finally, a stronger wave of diarrhea with a surge of nausea, and I run to the bathroom, sit down for one and then stand up and vomit violently, letting it all out. I absolutely hate vomiting (ok, I guess nobody likes it too much lol). I think this post is getting graphic enough as it is, so I won't get into too many details, but let's just say it put me off grilled meats for a while.
Relief. When I'm done with the vomiting I know it's the end of the acute phase of my episode. Utter relief, in a sense, but also total exhaustion. I will blog more about what it feels like after an acute episode like that next time. Right now, it's time for me to leave.